Stories too short & unfinished Songs...

such a tragedy.  but then again.. how would I know?  I'm drugged and sleepless.  my reality might as well be yours.  throat scratchy & burning.  zombie with a headache.  the only thing i'm sure of:  i'm tired & i'm unsure why i can't sleep.  makeup smeared.  who needs it.  the one who loves me says he sees through it anyways.  dreams & wishes of how i wish i looked.  different hair.  color/cut/style.  "be who you want to be"   who do i want to be.  tell me.  i'm no good at making my own decisions.  trust me.   my brain's a frozen core.  it won't even tell ME what it's thinking.  it just keeps knocking me on my ass.  it likes to hurt me: my brain.  saying things i don't want to say.  doing pointless things.  not enough effort & all too much in all the wrong places.  makes me want to stop trying.  but what's a girl to do?